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h0lidAYS!

2004-11-04T06:48:00.000+08:00

hey guys! it's the h0lz alreadi. but i gotta admit, its kinda boring and all wit the puase goin on. i intended to go to the gym or play badminton or head to the beach but i gez everybody's kinda lazed out. aniwae, alota things happened since school ws abt to end. but i tink i'll update later. here are some pictures. year-end phots here guys!

SNEAK PEEKS!

YEAR-END PICS!

AliCiA-WANNAbE...

2004-10-25T05:55:00.000+08:00

ma maid and i

shez cool sometimes...

she did this

for me to perform...

POOF!after i took the braids off...

arhhh!

whatever. tml's skool guys! cant wait! haha...

tAUfik bRiGhtENS UP MA dAY!

2004-10-20T20:20:00.000+08:00

tAUfik RAWkS the id0l h0ME! hah... well, at least the songs he chooses are like all ma favorites... my girl has alwaes been one of those ma family and i wud sing at karaoke rooms! then we'll dance around... ahhh! taufik makes me feel not alone... haha. somehow! if only he was younger... haha. okay shuttup... but nope, not infatuated wit tis guy... he just makes me GROOOVE! if ever i have a guy... he will be lk taufik... mayb not personality... musically i gez! YEAH! haha... [VOTE FOR TAUFIK EVERBODY!]

~ba de ya~say do you remember~ba de ya~dancin in september~ba de ya~never was it a cloudy day~

that was the 80s song! omigawd... yummy... wonder how'd everyone hit the dance floor...

dEdiCAti0N...

2004-10-18T16:55:00.000+08:00

how do you love someone
that hurts you oh so bad
with intentions good
was all he ever had

but how do I let go when I've
loved him for so long and I've
givin him all that I could
maybe love is a hopeless crime
giving up what seems your lifetime
what went wrong with something once so good?

chorus:
how do you find the words to say (to say, to say)
to say goodbye (goodbye)
(find the words to say goodbye)
when your heart don't have the heart to say (to say, to say)
to say goodbye (goodbye)
(find the words to say goodbye)

I know now I was naive
never knew where this would lead (ya ya ya ya)
and I'm not tryin' to take away (oh no)
from the good man that he is

but how do I let go when I've
loved him for so long and I've
givin' him all that I could
was it something wrong that we did?
oh, cause others infiltrated
what went wrong with something once so good?

[chorus]

is this the end (end)
are you sure (are you sure)
how should you know when you've never been here before
it's so hard (hard)
to just let go (just let go)
when this is the one and only love I've ever known (known) so...

[chorus]
how do you find the words to say (when it's been so long)
to say goodbye (to say goodbye)
(find the words to say goodbye)
when your heart don't have the heart to say (hmm hmm yea)
to say goodbye (to say, to say goodbye)
(find the words to say goodbye)

how do you find the words to say (to say, to say goodbye)
to say goodbye (to say, to say goodbye, my love)
(find the words to say goodbye) (oo oo yea)
when your heart don't have the heart to say (no my heart don't have the heart...)
to say goodbye (to say, to say...)

i just had ta look thru friendster again... couldnt take it animore. well, an old song of alicia keys... one that suits ma mood whenever im feelin tis way... tis one goes to Faie...

[dun know why i cant let go... so frustrating... arh!]

A 100 YEARS t0 liVE

2004-10-17T00:20:00.000+08:00

ok, that was rude... wished all ma malay frens a selamat-menjalani-ibadah-puasa and fiq was like iyelah, selamat hari raya... then went offline. wateva la... aiyer... ah heck, well, i juz got home from study wit amalia... headed for the MP library at first. yadayadayada... we decided to move out cuz the place wasnt as condusive. and its all because why?... ALL OTHER SCHOOLS HAVE FINISHED THEIR EXAMS!... and we're here still struggling... maths and science are not over to make it all worse. monday's amalia's birthday... *sHhH... u guys noe wat that means* heh... the timing could've never been more wrong. haiz... but im SURE that we'll have a big birthday bash for amalia one of these holidaes. ECP? yeahs... save up SAVE UP! im broke... uh. i might force ma parents to go out tonight to buy her prezzie. so to carry on, we were walking towards the steps to study... but, me and my undeniably strong senses, sensed that "someone" was following us just as we walked out of the building. so, i turned around and automatically turned back to amalia and cursed... u noe wat that means~ KAMBENG. again. she walked wit him and he asked her shyt stuff, i walked ahead trying to express ma anger (told him NOT to come and harrass ma fren animore! argh!) then amalia ran up to me... the goat sat on the steps and amalia wanted us to pretend as if we were goin hm... and i, as usual, gestured bashing him up, and of course, as we brisked towards the bus stand, i said stuff like "im running like a bee" (and that i did) "im talking like a mouse!" (and that i did) YEAH! hez an asshole. amalia hates him now too... 1) irritating 2) calls non stop AT NITE 3) spys, stalks us wherever we go 4) acts cool. well i gez it'll be an endless list... so why bother bout ppl like him or rahter goats LIKE HIM! eee~ we headed for the beach. was kinda lk ghost town but very windy and cool... so, really nice place to study... at the benches... so i lied on the table and exchange answers wit amalia [GEOG] nice, cuz got ta learn quite alot. at least better than maths. i loved it. called Ayim. he wanted to buka puasa outside wit me and ma friends, and his too someday next week. depends if ma parents allow. hope can uh. okay so we went back to parkway and looked for hari raya shoes. hahz... just fer a while... i tink des sth id wanna buy for am... heh... so here i am lah... kay gonna buka soon... [tho im not fasting. haha. sHhH~]

i l0VE AliCiA kEYS!Ahhh!

2004-10-08T18:40:00.000+08:00

just g0t h0me fr0m alicia's c0ncert... 0mg... it was FANTASTIC l0rhhh... itz 12.30 n0w... sko0l nite yawww... when i was lk in it... the ambience was just... PHEW! everyb0dy's sh0utin at the t0p 0f their lungs, and surprisingly, MY BR0THER! yes! he danced t0o... and 0f c0urse ma sister and i w0uld be crazy en0ugh to stand 0n the friggin chair and dance 0n it. and there were certain thgs we f0und 0ut b0ut s'p0reans... well, f0r 1, they're not c0nfident. haha. s0meh0w, my sh0uts and cheers were effective t0 break the silence and everyb0dy will be cheering. thatz wat ma br0ther disc0vered any way...heheh... also, many cant actually dance. they stand up and 'try' t0 dance but as s00n as they realised they aint g0od at it... they'll juz b standin fer nth... haha... esp these tw0 mak ciks diagonally in fronta us... b0bbing their heads and all wit the tudung.haha... well, we had al0ta ang m0hs ard... 0ld s0 i gez th0se ppl felt kinda outta place... but HEY!!! this is the BEST CONCERT EVER! oh wait, tis is my FIRST... but still will alwaes b de best lah cuz alicia has alwaes been MY INSPIRATION... keke... shez soo nufkin gifted muuun... VOICE, piano talent, LOOKS, stage perf0rmance, HARVARD GRAD... itz juz unbelievable that ma sis said that there MUST be something wrong wit her! cuz God is fair. haha... well... she has FAT ARMS... haha... thatz all... but i find it quite unfair actually wen she has 0nly 1 thg bad abt herself yet m0st 0f all 0f us have s0 many thgs WR0NG wit ourselves. haha... whatever lah... i just l0ve her t0 death can? i juz wished summa ma frens were there wit me... not that i din enjoy wit ma siblings... juz dat tis kinda thang... u just GOTTA haf frens to share it wit... many apologies to raihan for calling her and sounding soo excited... i juz cant help it. haha... but u understand rite raihan? i knooow u haf dat CHEEKY SMILE! haha... well, it wud be etra terriffic if i had you guyz there... awww... nvm... more beach parties and open events to come afta da examz... puase? dun worry... pretend u haf ur menses.. haha! *eViL* well, it was all g0od... yea...

i NEEd t0 KENChiNG... 0Uff!!!

2004-09-18T01:17:00.000+08:00

DAMN! juz now raihan didnt getta follow us! well, her mom didnt allow... and decided to send her to the dentist herself... sooo was kinda moody at first lah... QUIET. not like always... haha. i oso got no mood. budden after sitting at LJS at far east... loosened up... luff like shyt talking bout all the stupud ELS VIDEO-MAKING last year! haha... the doorbell... ms ng got slapped... the hanging arm... "Ohhh Enyaaa"... riduan running like fuck... hahaha... eee... de fake ball-and-bike dropping... AIYERRR!... aniwae, supposed to wake up early tml... goin DISCOVERY CENTRE... at 6.45am! crap sia... thatz earlier than skool time... madness... well, FAIE'S ONLINE... yep, wanna talk to him abt alota thgs but i gez nolah... i tink i'll juz pretend to TALK RUBBISH wit him... kayz...

2004-09-16T22:26:00.000+08:00

felt like shitting the whole day... hahahaha... like whatever. den i tahan. of course, knowing me... i eat alot... and i mean ALOT!!! then all the food gathered in ma belly... more food got in at LJS lahhh... den i really REALLY felt like shitting lorh... so i did all wanna-berak gestures... ahahahahaha! den i accidentally overturned the plate and all the chicken bergolek2... den all the flakes fell onto amalia... wahaha... siaooo uh... haiyahhh... YAY! tomorrow i'm goin TO TOWN with ma frens! WOOHOO! well, gonna take some pictures lah... places teenagers chill out... hip n happenin hangouts... for tis project... yadayadayada... den gonna accompany raihan to the dentist at outram! kekekeke... so cute lahhh... ahakz. aniwae, am ALMOST talked to ismail just now. kakaka... dat was soo farnie... i had GOOSEBUMPS muuun... aiyerrr...ouh yah! just finished watching SINGAPORE IDOL... omg... itz so ridiculous can?!!! they're deaf lahhh... i mean not like all of them cant sing or wat lah... but there are BETTER ppl in there! and of all ppl, the judges chose MAIA... i mean... they should know better whuttt... then that stupid sylvester... lucky beverly got in... but i pity GOLLUM lah... she shud get in kay... THAT VOICE for that size... wauuu... ouh well~ gotta gooo studiiieee... PEACE! uh, crap... this poems fer that someone... oh well! i wanna love every bit of life... TEEHEEZ!

NIGHTMARE

the last thing that i'd ever want
is you to see me grieve
you know as well that if you did
you'd turn your back and leave
the pain has become a part of me
for enough of my heart is mine
the rest of it belongs to you
if you'd only seek, you'd find

so here we are, just drifting
we're neither here nor there
and though you always say you do
i don't believe you care

C00l NitE

2004-09-05T02:51:00.000+08:00

whee! s0s0s0s0 fun... excluding de wh0le "c0nflict"... g0t back wit s0me 0ld frens... straightened thgs 0ut.... baked s0me br0wnies... watched a cinderella st0ry... ouh, 0uh!... de dance c0mpetiti0n at suntec was s0o kewl 0kay! de dance m0ves... w0w... it was s0o nice! i dunn0 which grp w0n but they were in an all-white c0stume wit c0lourful hair. ahakz! thhen... yadayadayada... datz it lah... slpy alreadi. hafta g0 fer abg jai, ma cuzzie's wedding tml... haizzz... grrr...

tEAChERS' dAY 04

2004-09-01T03:03:00.000+08:00

o ma gawwwd! today was sosososo fuuun!!! haha... like in de mornin had aces day and everybody in de sec 2 area was fooling around. we had the 'motivators'. haha. they should've just gone w/o de ugly cap. looked so retarded. but hey, quite a few of the classes wore their class tees. it was sooo nice! 2A, B, and C were wearing them... the skool looked so colourful! but i think i still love ma class's one de most. haha! and ya know whut? de teachers danced too at the back of de hall! that was so farnie... ms lian was sooo enthusisatic... like flexible uh. den we had mdm noredha who was doin de warm-ups and giving a free show to de skool. her belly was an eye-sore tho. haha. den we had cikgu slamah... u cant even imagine! seeing her with that looong dress and.... haha... den all de other teachers whom many of us were laughing our asses of at! too bad de sec 3s and 5s had to sit at the netball court. so aniwae, went back to class at around 8.30. ms ng, as usual, resumed wit de lessons... but before that, art was okay... nothing much happened. then i had to go off to change fer band at around 9.20. so, didnt see amalia fer the rest of the day cuz she just went off after de celebration to TKP. i missed her. aniwae, i had recess together with raihan, irni and dalila... then, wen 2A n D came down fer their recess, raihan annd i sat wit them. as they left, we made our way to de band room to set up our instrunments. i brought sweets and gums.... so, ya noe... then a while later, had to go up to de hall... around 10 plus. the classes were coming in. so blablabla... e celebration started off wit prefects brging in de teachers frm de staff room to de hall. they were all holding on to a bear which had their names written on de velvet thgy... of course our band played... hehe! just kinda like bored of de few same old songz.after dat, i dunno wat happened... got lahhh... i tink performance... or a speech... wateva. the first one was the me against de music dance... haha. shida was so cute wit dat visor on and all... it was okay lah... wasnt anything close to a flop. den i dunno wat lah... but i noe had juffri's item... de dance break... it was sooo kewl and so cute!!! i liked dat one best. especially when they had that black cloth on like some ghost liddat. haha... cant forget juffri. den dat talentime guy hu cant sing... haha. at least ppl were cheering fer him... laughing and cheering. ahakz... but he din sing that... "I will come back for you" song with galvin... haiz... haha... den had mary-ann's and maisha's item... and to our surprise, they had more background singerzzz! omg! they shudn't haf had them mannn! spoiler sia... mary-ann should've sung alone... her solo was sooo good!!! ugh! but hey, the whole thing made the celebration fun! haha... yup... den der was the malay dance and the dikir barat in which mr ridzuan was the wateva... at first was exciting seeing him so sporting budden got really bored after dat. later on, had a skit... performed by mr michael, sum other guy teacher, ms hana, ms marinah, shanaz and a few ELS members. it was darned hilarious! esp wit ms hana wearing dat friggin looong skirt! and mr michael wit his bald head... mrs low a nerd... haha... BODOH X BODOH=DOUBLE BODOH... wat the fcuk rite... haha... i loiiike so much! then yah... wateva... all the ex-bdsians were loafing around at the corridors of de hall... haha... like gemma says... all look hip but very unsuccessful... haha... they look like one of those we alwaes critisize on the streets. okay, back to ma story... i dunno wen was tis but had de teachers prize-giving!... didnt really know hu got wat cuz de band had to play... then, yati, pei liang and the other ex-co members of the band got on stage... mr jais didnt know wat was cumin... and he was shocked to hear his name bein mentioned... so he sat down... listened to de speech... prizes were given oput to ms alsagoff, mrs low, and of course ms alsagoff. then yah... especially to mr jais. he got a really huge teddy bear okay!!! haha... i gez our $5 means nothing now. and some asses had to cry durg e speech. wat the hell... i mean, u cant b soo happy and emotional at the same time over such thing.furthermore, they're only sec 2s. not like they've known em fer a gazillion yrs. though it was all worthwhile... the band stood up fer em uh and all... dunno hu shouted "we love you, mr jais!"... but hell, on behalf of the rest... so... then came de singing part..... i believe i can fly... hahaha... mr tay just cant get enuff of dat song muuun! he acted before he sang on stage, wearing de skool uniform... ahakz! band plak... want... dun wan.. wan... dun wan to stand... in the end nobody stood up thruout de song. dunno wat happened following that...alota stuff happened lahhh... throw water lah... party stuff... balloon lah... some danced... oh yah... de sec 5A students did the retro dance... well it was okay but most of us felt that they werent original cuz the sec5s laz yr did that... and it was better last yr... kinda boring la tis one. kaaay... den dunno lah... but we cleared up de band stuff... and left... fana, gem, raihan and i as usual... went to mac's... a whole lot of ppl... no, actuarlie went ot LJS first but was crowded and we actually waited outside wit tis big grp... so as soon as tis other grp got out... we were running into de place n pushing those ppl and i was like sucha clutz pushing ppl's chair and all... haha. we're so retarded! seriously! haha! met that raudhah gurl... MXPS la... wit her frens... ahaha... kirim salam ma bro... shez changed... she ran down... hehe... kewl... den ya lah... nth else after mac's so riahan and gem went hm... while fana and i looked fer amalia at parkway... she wasnt der... haiz... so, went hm... was really tired... so i slept n slept... until almost 8. so, had dinner and here i am, nothing to do and wasting ma time typing out wat happened in the dae... ahakz! dat is y im stopping here to prevent myself frm getting any more pathetic. wakaka! oh yah... met ibrahim at mac, took a picture... haha... i reallie wanna see how it'll turn out... cuz i blinked ma eyes... klah... nth else... had a gr8 time overall!

jUSt t0dAY

2004-08-25T03:28:00.000+08:00

wow... it's reallie been a while since i last updated. crap! aniwae, skool's been kinda fun. like alota crap... but hell, it's all kewl. haha... today we did the banner. not gonna comment. was fun trying to pull out the stupid cap from the spray cans... hahaha! well, crashed at ma hse fer some fooood! whee! not thaaat yummy but yah, still good. anyway, Am got student of the term award today! ahakz! she said i screamed funnny. so meeeann uh Am! at least i'm willing to embarrass maself for a fren rite... haiii... ahakz. and she got reallie good resultz fer all the tests we got today. same as me! whee! 37/40 fer maths! sooo surprising! hehe. well, somebody wants to get to know her. well, i guess she knew before i did. gurls haf their instincts. hehe. but no, i'm not gonna let em take her away from me! never! NEVER!!! she is miiine! haha... crap, sucha lesbian... but she sooo deserves more than that lorh! haha. Am notty gurl oreadi... no more innocent baby. haha... just love her lah...

hai... been feel kinda fcuked up these daes. dunno wat got over me. well, it's fun and stuff with ma frens. they make me happy as ever. it's just that... life just sucks... when you think about it rite... you're all alone. you can't seem to fulfill that big space inside of you. and somehow, you just cant measure up to those around you. then you try to be better but always end up screwing everything.

as a matter of fact, i dun even know whut the hell i'm talkin about. i'm just lost, that's all. like, there's so many desiscions i hafta make. it's like, choosing a between a life with a big circle of friends, being popular, loved, trendy, only focused on the outstanding qualities of being a good friend and a life that will bring satisfaction to your parents, doing the right things, getting good results... both have outcomes. how can i have both? i dun want everything. i just need to have a purpose in my life. a strong one that'll never go away. it's not wholly my parents because perhaps, somewhere along the road, i screwed up with them and now everything's different. it's not wholly my friends either. i dun want to conquer a skool, i dun wanna gossip, i dun wanna love cause i cant..., i dun wanna be anything at all. i dun want anything. i dun wanna be praised just to feel good. whut is there after once u've felt good?

nothing seems to interest me anymore.

i'm scared. i dun wanna stay this way nor do i wanna change. for example... u haf frens->popular->become a good fren or a snobby bitch->do well academically or the other way ard->success or failure->??? (what is there after u've succeded or failed?) whut? this...? get good, stable jobs or beg on the streets->have a family with big houses or just alone to dwell on ur ugly past->??? (yup, still de same qn mark!) and just die? is that really how life is? what are we all living for... our deaths? i can't live for me cuz no one can't, especially if ure the one with poor everything...

noe whut? maybe i just live for God. yup! or maybe it'll come to me sooner or later... *rUz In SeRi0Us NeEd Of TrEATmEnT*

thE dAY ShE lEft...

2004-08-10T19:32:00.000+08:00

my... bibik left today. just got back from the airport. didn't think i'd cry but i did... as we were leaving the house and lugging her heavy bags, in the car heading towards the airport, in the airport itself. well, what can u sae... she's been with me for 8 yrs, which makes me in primary 1 the first time she arrived here. well, i guess, besides leaving cuz she juz cant put up with us grown-up kids animore, it's about time that she settled down at home with her family. well, it's been 20 years toiling for money. 4 yrs in saudi arabia, 8 yrs wit ma cousins and another 8 with us. but, however much depressed i am, i'm still very happy for her. i think i'll write to her one of these days and send her pictures. well, fighting wit ma sis right now. dun haf the mood to write animore. wrote a long one juz now and accidentally closed the window. really bad day yea... but i'll remember today always. haiii...

NAtiONAl dAY CElEbRAtiON

2004-08-07T12:25:00.000+08:00

whee! today was soo much fun! i guess... haha. well, it din start out that good lah cuz when i was in the hall during IR, gemma and i decided to take off our second layer cuz it was like friggin hot. so we went to da toilet and i had ma sleevess top on. so i sat down at the last row. then ms lian came in fronta me at the bottom of da stairs and said out loud, "ruzanna, ure asking for trouble! put on ur white shirt on now!" and i said okay i will. but u just dun say it anymore and just sit down i dun want everybody to stare at me anymore. but she juz wont budge until i do in fronta her and in fronta everyone else including the sec 5s hu were sitted behind me! bloody toot sia! i noe its like not that good for a muslim to wear sleeveless la but its nth wat... its not showing any cleavage or ANYTHING! embarrassing sia. she could have at least pulled me to one side and tell me that rite! aniwae, i dun a give a damn. i'll get over it. aniwae, the celebration was just soo boring! until it came to the singing part uh. ya noe us... mad ppl... so, jump ard and stuff... runnin in and out. screamin and shouting. took pictures... whee! loved it. haha. then, after dat, took pics wit certain peeps. eheez! kewl... den went off to our brain damaging spree! first off to long john's in tampines. gem and lina went off frm der... cuz gem was sick and lina wasnt allowed to go anywer else... so, we got on the train to the esplanade... and we sure do know our way around town now! like experts! hehe. went to the roof terrace... and of course... was a long way and they were makin funna me... like how i dunno da way and getting dem lost. but i sure did show them! whaha... niiice. loved it there... took pics again. left raihan in da toilet a while. haha. lucky she din get lost. ahakz! den went walking dwn to the merlion... den to lau pa sat... drank there, where raihan had big fights with the coke. ahaha... took a bus to orchard... nth there... so juz walked ard. wanted to go to the beach but was kinda late. aniwae, as we were walking, raihan saw some cute guy at the traffic light and she pointed him out to us. oklah... BUT, he was with his girl... and another guy fren. so, there she was... drooling over him... coincidentally he was goin da same way, so it was like as if we were following him. they sensed it i guess. and the couple were all over each other... so rude! juz want us to terasa... all went to da mrt station lah to go hm... and they also took da same route... so tried to take his pics la... tis is the first time eva chasing a guy u noe... i mean, cumin frm raihan? haha... so aniwae, he also dropped at bedok int but... in the end din go up to him... cuz he walked too far. hehe... so then off we went, happily home... i hope raihan's nt too disappointed. haha. k gtg maths tuition now... see da pics... da gallery's at http://ndpbds04.mypicgallery.com but here are some...

RACiAl hARMONY CAMPfiRE 04

2004-08-01T15:33:00.000+08:00

walkin towards the camp

ei,apek!lu takde plasan lu punye pantat terkluar?

whack!whack!

cheerleadin?fcuk u man babat-exposers!

breakaway frm the crowd

groove it behbey!

now tis is whut u call campFIRE!

sweatin like a pig... *pAnTs*

the more we get together,together...the merrier we'll be

journey home... *sIgHs*

omg! today was just super duper FUN! i cant take long writing this entry cuz im goin out for a movie soon. aniwae, first went to school for the auditions for teachers' day. which was kinda like an alien thg to me cuz i was there alone goin frm one place to another. well, finally got the courage to come up to rifaie and sit down beside him to talk in the hall. that was cool! loved being by his side tho prolly in his head hez thinking, "wtf are u doing here?! buzz off man! ure such an irritant!" well, din reallie talk that much but ya noe i was natural. cheh~ hehe. unfortunately, he went home with musliha wen he had already seen me walkin behind him. plus, he walked the mastari's route which is kinda deserted. but its okay... they're friends. i juz wish i was her. dammit! so to carry on, i went lookin for ppl all by maself in bedok interchange... the sec 4d peeps were there doin flag day. haha! well, dropped a coin in hafiz's coin box or wateva... well, i saw rasyidi and asked him to walk with me... so we walked and i 'tried' askin ppl to donate but to no avail... shytto! well at least he got a dollar plus from chee sim. hehe! then yadayadayada... i juz went straight hm since it was already 1+ and i was supposed to be in skool by 2.30 for the racial harmony campfire. so ate and stuff... parents sent to skool. was excited. so wen we arrived at the east coast park... alota ppl were already there... it was kinda boring at first... but u noe got to see wats inside da goodie bag! whee! food! wahahaha!. anyhoo... wen it got a lil darker... thgs was already warmed up and prolly our skool was the only one shouting like stupid idiots. haha... but it was fun... did the wave... sang songs... den finally! night time! like friggin pubs in md sultan sia... well at least it was at our side... haha... our skool ah... create havoc! they played songs and stuff... i bet all the other skools werent concentrating on the performance itself... the were lookin at us! hahaha... the whole skool participated... like there was not even a single person on bedok south's chairs... everybody was up and dancing and screaming! take pictures lah... fight wit each other... throw stuff... but we were mostly dancing in unison until lk wen it came was comin to an end. it was juz soo fun! like an outdoor pub... and underaged ppl in it... we were sweating like shyt man! worse than 4km cross country but FUN-NER! actually... u cant even compare tis to that... cuz tis one was juz... MAN! im still all hyped up! i cant get out of this dancing and screamin system... well, gtg! write in more if i do haf sth else to sae! toodles...

kiNdA hAPPY t0dAY, i thiNK..

2004-07-31T18:47:00.000+08:00

im juz s0 happy t0day. am i? haha! i f0rg0t! shyt! i slept s0 much i can barely remember anything that happened t0day, 0r rather, yesterday actually. and surprisingly, the 0ral exams werent that bad! f0rtunately f0r me, i didnt get mr sandhu. whee! as well as lina,amalia and gemma... s0 like practically all 0f us t0gether uh... we g0t ms alsag0ff instead. shez superbly nice! but everyb0dy was like fussing b0ut h0w informally they talked under c0nversati0n. hehe. well, nth much happened in sk00l th0 (well, more like i cant remember.). just that t0day was the first time i ever paid attenti0n in maths. haha. i feel s0 g00d ab0ut maself! all thanks t0 amalia wh0 helped me t0 understand and finally ive started the race with all 0f u smart asses! ouh! had ma sh0w n tell t0day. sh0wed ma digicam. i n0e its kinda lame uh but seri0usly, tha camera means al0t t0 me. preci0us mem0ries-helps remember thgs that u've f0rg0tten. well, after 0ral, went d0wn t0 the canteen-0ur meetin p0int. but din meet ani0ne there. haha. i guess partially cuz there was s0me0ne there they'd pr0lly puke if they stayed l0ng enuff and the 0ther half cuz they wanted t0 g0 t0 the sk00l library, and in it was where i found ma dear frens. ahakz! dinn0e gemma was there initially until she came up t0 me. i went straight t0 where lina was. she was merrily surfing the net and br0wsing friendster. haha. so went all nutsy wit da rez there uh. till i realised there were m0re 0f ma frens. irfana, izza and all... playin scrabble. haha! poor irfana! left t0 r0t there wit s0me stupid freakz! juz f0r 0ne miserable c0mpetiti0n, they're practicing every single day! whut shyt is dat rite?! plus, they win alm0st every time! and itz n0t even the scrabble players. the winners will always be irfana, irni, izza, naj and JJ all... cant they juz give them a chance to not c0me f0r scrabble at all? bl00dy t00t mun! but it was fun hangin round wit them th0 kinda hafta bear wit the lame-ass game. but, i was surfing the net m0re. whee! then, lina and i realised we were supp0sed t0 do prefect's duty s0 we kinda juz sh0wed 0ur face t0 ms abraham when there was n0thing t0 d0 anym0re. haha. in the end, she made us, along with su hu came minutes later, supervise muzammil fr0m 5B pick up litter ar0und the sk00l f0r c0nstant late-c0ming. haha. 3 sec 2 gurls bullying a sec 5 kid. that was fun! we directed him t0 pick up all the litter. so mean sia... but we did help 0ut here and there. but i bet underneath all that, he still l0ves us! *pUkEs* sure whut rite? its n0t every day ure instructed t0 pick up alm0st every single piece of litter on the gr0und from three cl0wns. well, cut ma finger cuz 0f that. we picked up br0ken pieces 0f glass panes. fell fr0m s0me class... then, su, am and i couldn't find the rest after that, s0 lina wh0 ran 0ff t0 be wit zimmie, tagged along t0 g0 walk t0 tanah merah. l0tsa stuff happened uh. saw mUzIe (muzammil la) at tanah merah again. he saw us and aut0matically hid behind the pillar. w0w! his c0rrecti0nal work muz b sucha trauma huh? haha! he t00k the no. 2 bus wit lina... well, at least shez g0t 'company'. well her zimmie and the rez of the ncc members left for camp at the HQ. we t00k 38 and err... yadayadayada... su went hm, am and i ate at Mac when we saw tw0 ms abraham l00k-alikes. wakakaka! h0ped t0 find nurul there but as expected, she wasnt.im still bl0ated up man! 0www... aniwae, naj was bein a t0tal !@#$% t0wards me t0day. like wen i said, "Hie!..." no reply... "Hie Najmah!"... no reply... "Sombong sehhh"... no reply... "Aper uh?"... no reply and c0ntinues writing 0n the bl00dy b0ard. and al0ta 0ther thgs... which i cant be b0thered. i just hate ppl wen they d0 that. sheesh! like c'm0n mun! h0w childish is that? whut have i d0ne wr0ng n0w? its always n0t truly ur fault uh? i n0e, u t0ld me ure the 0ne havin t0 ap0logise mosta the time. i neva f0ught wit u b4. in fact, i defended u every time u guys were squabbling n shyt. but that's n0t the p0int. isnt the dispute like OVER? s0... chillz uh gurl... if u n i.. u n0e... and i h0pe that never happens... i din want it t0... u see ah... that was like quite a l0ng time ag0. im sorrie if i said sth reallie hurtful. i guess.. in a way 0r tw0, i went a bit 0verb0ard. u wanna get depressed 0ver me? NO rite?! neither d0 i 0ver u... haha... w0w, im juz s0 plain mean. yea, but i mean seri0usly... im not w0rth ur cauti0ns. ahakz! so naj! listen, been d0in al0ta thinking after whut hueva said ab0ut us and i realised, i missed u! but u dun hafta miss me... and i dun even hafta sae tt. haha. i still l0ve u lah either ways... 0uh! and i really wanna ap0l0gise f0r bein a lil awkward these days... if ure readin tis aniwae... well, its c0mpletely up t0 u h0w we're g0nna be... cuz im like l0vIn LiFe rite n0w... spending ma laz few mths in sec 2... haha! 0kay! s0 remember t0 chill! wakaka... n0t everything in tis w0rld is negative... n0t everyb0dy has bad intenti0ns... hm, s0unding like ma parents! crap! wahaha... aniwae, cant wait f0r t0day! i mean later 0n t0day... first, hafta wake up ar0und nine and reach sk00l by 10am. teachers' day stuff. hehe. which means im getting t0 meet *aHeM!* whee! then at ard 2.45pm, band members will meet t0 prepare f0r the campfire which will start at ar0und f0ur at east c0ast park till abt nine at nite... will hafta wear p.e on top and any pants 0f my ch0ice. stupid rite? mite as well wear fully h0me cl0thes. kewl! will be takin pictures! s0... i'll write in again tml! see yaz! t00dles!

SUCkY...

2004-07-28T21:24:00.000+08:00

kinda sucked today... though mrs lai had left a cheese sandwich on ma table in da morning. it was really sweet of her to go round givin all the talentime participants a token of appreciation... hafta thank her when i see her. it's 9:30pm... and i cant friggin get the maths stuff into ma head... HELP! im soo dead for tml's test! argh... i cant stand it! wish sum1 cud help wit all these thgs... yea, there are... but, juz cant quite grasp it! i hate maths and science! as much as i want to, i can never bring myself into liking em... it's just soo hard! need a 100m to get A1 fer maths... wow... like im gonna get it... even the smartest person dun get that kinda marks... haf science hw, study maths, maths ass., study history... i wish the world would just STOP for a second and let stupid arseholes like me catch up! grrr... yup, again to my time management... it sucks i know!... ms lian tells me i should be more focused. i dunno if its only in terms of work but i have a feeling it's like in general. that's the problem... how do i keep up? when im still stuck in the past? like everyone is soo ahead of me... and i've tried to keep up. but the thgs that go on ard me... i dunno. im juz soo confused rite now! im scared... i cried da second interview wit ms lian.. wen i said i was afraid. sometimes, i dunno wat im afraid of... there's juz soo many things! and i realised recently, that i've just stopped trying. i guess it's really true wen i said im tired of doing so. life... it hasn't been asacly a bore. in fact, it's totally exciting. it's just that... it feels as if im in a rush. i cant live for a moment... and feel anything about it. im soo dead and numb rite now! there's just soo many things missing in ma life. i know it's dumb and all but like, there's just no meaning in ma life. wat do i live for? wat purpose? i mean it as in seriously... i cant find the things that im good at, at all. ma sister always say that i would find it one day... and honestly, i'll wait for that! i noe i can be sth... but, im in such doubt at the moment. it's obvious dat i wont b some professor nor a lawyer. at times, i feel as if i dun deserve the world bcuz the world is just waaay too beyond all of who i am. i really am in NEED of sth... but i cant quite figure out wat it is. well, looks like i'm not the independant gurl that i once thought i was. [i just GOTTA carry on!]

tAlENtiME!

2004-07-27T18:31:00.000+08:00

juffri! he was soo cute okay!!! so small.. aww!

that's me! swayin away..

uh! i hate her! wahaha.. nah, she did deserve da top!

blardy toot! din friggin win it! why?! WHY? why?.. oh well, ruzanna.. u din haf ur minus 1.. haha.. well, at least i dun feel so bad abt it.. i tot i was gonna b e laughing stock of e mth! shyt mun! kakaka.. i tell u.. i was soo nervous e mike was juz shakin.. but i gotta admit.. i did look da best! wahahaha! am i rite, am i rite?! but of course, those three did deserve it.. took them a while to practice and get e minus 1. fer me? juz laz nite only. wow! and gemma was soo sweet! she did me a banner sayin "GO RUZIE" and 2A was cheerin.. aww! tis is like da happiest loserly performance i have ever had! whee! now everybody's callin me Ruzie.. hehe.. cool! but maisha's class did a reallie big banner.. and she sang.. fuyoh! i was like screamin backstage.. taken away. it's okay.. i mite have been seen as da gurl hu lost talentime.. nvm.. hafiz and i are reallie gonna practice hard for teacher's day ar! WATCHOUT mun!!! hahaha.. k i guess dats abt it..

RAihAN'S bURfdAE

2004-07-26T18:01:00.000+08:00

SERiOUSlY NOt mA tYPiCAl SUNdAY...

2004-07-26T02:03:00.000+08:00

ma beloved uncle's first birthdae celeb wit us

advanced one actuarlie

hm.. im getting used to this.. posting stupid pics in ma blog. arh!.. heck lah.. i'll get bored of it sooner or later.. soo.. todae sucked shyt.. father wanted ta hit me wit a friggin plate.. asshole! BUT.. haha.. i dun give a fcuk. he din do it larh.. if he did i wud've walked outta da hse alreadi.. went to tuition in da morning.. not too bad. din get to do much work after dat tho.. kinda panicked over ma minus 1 song.. singin "You Were Meant For Me" this tuesday. im gettin scared.. but im juz doin tis fer fun.. jihadi like left me all alone.. shyt u jihadi! hahaha! nvm.. challenge ah! ma sista betta brg home da MD tml so i cn record her playing da guitar.. it's acoustic.. how kewl. i'll b performin on tcr's dae as well.. doin a duet wit hafiz. a jazzy song. michael buble's version of "The Way You Look Tonight". hm... they're gonna luff mun.. hez like THAT tall.. and im like.. a friggin rat.. guess i'll juz b sittin on a stool which is far better.. ma legs dun wobble conspicuosly. haha! damn, ma that fingers on ma right hand are all red.. ate 'tulang' juz now during da "Family Feast". kakakaka.. kayz.. tink im not gon waste time on tis piece of crap animore.. toodles!

WAt AM i fEEliN?

2004-07-24T00:06:00.000+08:00

did sum drawgs in geog lesson

sth's wrong wit her... hm, wat did i do?

my first session in street jazz

nearing plaza singapura

SPOTLIGHT BOOBIES!woohoo!haha...

am caught unprepared but still lookg gud

me! laughin away...

yellows... so today wasnt asacly wat i'd call a good day, but it was fine... juz not my typical fridays. hehe! started off studyin in da mornin, din go for recess but instead, went to see mrs lai in da musiq room to lk sing fer her again. i felt as if there was a need to reparticipate in da talentime. everybody noes dat im gonna b singin and den if i dun, they'll think lk wat... fight wit jihadi and chicken out? so, maybe hakim was right... i'll challenge jihadi! puiii! haha... k so i saw summa 2d ppl retained in da rm. cudnt go recess cuz they din submit some form, includin mas. i was lk shyt. den sang lah... lalalalala... i tot it was ok but... haha... again, da stage fright. mrs lai liked it tho. so, am n i went dwn fer the laz few min of recess. sat dwn and talked to the rez. saw faie, looked at me in a way... *sHiVeRs* den, had wateva wateva... and err... skipped prefects' duty and erm... history test dat i din take... after skool dat is. went to buy raihan's prezzie. it was da bag at Zinc, The Edge Bugis. reallie nice! vintage beb! walked ard... was kinda tired cuz we took a bus all e way frm skool... went back oso da same... so aniwae, went to eat at long john's bugis... haha... crap arh. cant think abt it... i'll crack up! den urm... walked all da way... to plaza singapura... jln2... walked again... tis time to orchard. it was soo far kay! i dunno hw we were even able to do it... haha! but it felt sucha short journey. went to look fer ndp clothes. haha... kiasu rite? but need to b reallie careful fer am's stuff. goin on stage on ndp. kekeke... so dats abt it lah... fun abit ar. still owe fana n am money... REMINDER: PAY UP SHARE A.S.A.P! COLLECT MONEY EVERYDAY. hehe! chaoz!

blANk

2004-07-21T19:58:00.000+08:00

i am feelin soo blank today. khakhakha... i dunno y. irni said i was depressed. crap! wakaka... izza said as if i looked at her as if she was gonna eat me up liddat... haha. wat sia. i tink im posessed today.

i aM s0o0o0 MiSsIn Em...

RACiAl hARMONY 04

2004-07-20T19:17:00.000+08:00

hey... todae was racial harmony! can be considered fun lah... actuarlie it was reallie fun! but too bad irfana didnt come. or else it would be a thousand times better! damn! so aniwae, i called amalia, who was ass-shit nervous in the mornin, asked her to brg shoes fer me and meet me at da bus stop at 6.45. den we changed. haha. was kinda weird walkin in punjabis around skool. hehe. am had terrible mood swings. she was like happy, den scared, excited... pissed off... moody lah... haiii... haha. but she was okay after a while. walked ard skool. went round takin photos... skipped a lil bit of science wit lina. in da mornin, during assembly... saw rifaie walk in... *mElTs* he was wearing white! wit da samping all! soo cute! wear same colour as me sia!!! laz yr was also da same... he wore tis pinkish-purple and i wore pink... coincidence muuun... grrr! im so frustrated and... disappointed. i cant take it... so upset. wasted sia! its lk his laz yr!!! dammit sia! and all tis while he pretended as if he din see me. but nvm lah... can take for other upcomin occasions... not much happened durg recess. didnt haf da appetite either. took a few pics n dats it... okay, well fast forwarding all da wae to assembly... was expectin ta see rifaie at da back of da hall and pull him aside juz to take a pic... but aniwaes, had fashiopn show and da continuation of yesterdae's video... fashion show wasnt as exciting as laz yr. furthermore, we were sittin at da gallery. juz a FAR overhead view! cant see shit lah... take pics oso lk crap... den i tot wanted to go dwn early take pictures wit all da peeps i promised to take pictures wit... budden da bloody sec 2 briefing... grrr!!! took up almost half an hour! den ended up takin pics wit izzat, hafiz, syidi and man... julia and alota other female peeps. rand HE was long gone... syafiq also left straight afta da briefing... bloody arse! well, din haf da mood to go tutor da fengshan pupils. skipped prefects' duty. went out wit da malay gurls. actuarlie raihan, am and i seperated a while juz to go eat at long john's while da rest ate at bk... kinda expensive ar der... okay... dats abt it... kinda tired now... summa da pics... if ya lazy to go ta da gallery.

SEEMS likE mA fiRSt dAY Of SkOOl

2004-07-13T22:02:00.001+08:00

it was a reallie funny day. oh nono... humiliating's more like it. haha. feel so kental-ated seh today. especially the part we ran all the way from near skool to tanah merah just to catch the # 14 bus just so we wont be late for tha tutoring programme. darn! i bet all the peeps in all tha buses that passed us by were laughing shyt *sIgHs* bds is sooo bUdGeT sia. i was saying... how can the skool not cater transport for something like THIS? if we're late like fer every session, wouldn't it brg dwn the skool name? wateva la. anyway, my tutee was sucha mute. for one, he's a retard. i asked him ah, " Do u always pass/fail English?" then he frowned and thought sooo bloody hard, looking up n down, at me... in the end he just kept quiet. i asked again, "Pass ke fail?!" then he got soo uptight at that so i juz shut up. i asked him to study well and then if he did i'll give him sweets n stuff. haha. man, i really hope i'll change him sia. its so scary seeing him liddat. take exam how? but to b really honest, i dun see how these students can benefit from us, who btw are also struggling with our skool work. k ar, enuff laughing fer today. i cant take it *rUz lAuGhIn AlL tHa WaY oUt*

SEEMS likE mA fiRSt dAY Of SkOOl

2004-07-13T22:02:00.000+08:00

iM hAPPY lOSt, WEll, StUff U WOUldNt WANNA REAd bOUt, SERiOUSlY.

2004-07-12T22:06:00.000+08:00

hm... haven't wrote in for quite a while already. maybe we should backtrack a lil huh? hehe. hm... so friday was the end of school week. so, of course as per normal, my friends and i went out together. it was soo much fun. we landed up in long john's. and yea, stayed in long, just crappin... and laugh at the smallest of things. haha. damn, it was a good thing the four of us didn't piss our pants laughin. then, i dunno where we went... but we did go shopping somewhere, hm... anyway, later we hung at the void deck where we always hung out... there were the multiplyin grass-cutters, the "flying" bin, the "killer" dog... haha. fuuny like mad sia... then after that i know we were at bedok int where we were practically running away from every person whom we tot was "mad". haha. wat shyt rite?! but i guess we all had phobias of ppl who's got their head all messed up. two daytime "cik pon"s in bedok. and one of them actually walked past irfana and "spat" into her ear... *LOL* it wasn't asacly spat but the kind where u pout ur lips and make that farting sound. like machine gun liddat. wahahaha! haiii... alot happened but Fridays are always to remember. then i got hm, heard ma sis got to see faie in the 31 bus. dammit! should've been there muuun! haha... but funny how both of them were familiar with each other. hehe. but it was a good thing. i dunno wat ma sis think of him tho. okok... soo... we watched "Mean Girls" on saturday... w/o ma sis who had to cancel at the laz minute. so there was 1 empty seat... well, i always seat beside her so i got the privelege of switching seats whenever i wanted to... muahaha! kk... well, that part was aite... budden, after we fetched ma sista... we went ta have supper at changi village. so there i was... while ma dad was parking the car... makin lame jokes, which obviously to him were rude. but i wasn't... i was just talkin bout hw ppl are goin anti-traffic and shyt... well, he reallie got mad at that cuz he tot i was tryna make fun of the way he drove... and even if i did, whut's with punching ma face? well, we all got outta da car and he started shouting at da top of his voice to me in front of alota other ppl. and u noe...dat was wen it happened. and i apologised before but i had to once more. he was still shouting. so i couldn't care and just cried. it was soo embarrassing. to even have that kinda dad... i can never forgive him for that. cuz no matter how many times i try, i never will. i'm tired of tryna make things rite between him and i or...us. he always think he's rite when sometimes, he's totally wrong. like when i try to teach him to do sth (eg, modern technology) he was having trouble with, he wouldn't listen. he'll always be.." Nooo, Nana... Just leave it to me lah... I know what I'm doing."... Klah, whatever lah... that's how i get. So, sunday when we visited our grannies, he REMINDED me to apologise ta him. OMG!... but knowin ma father, he won't stop it till u do... so, there it came, the insincere apology. just for ma own benefit. kay, i dun give a fcuk animore... leave him be lah. well, ma maid's goin hm afta da contract's over. squabble between her and ma brother. well, i guess ma parents were easily agitated partly cuz of that. ok. today? was oklah... but... haha. while i was havin P.E, i slipped and did a "split". well, the grass was wet and we had ta play soft ball. haha... damn! that was reallie painful sia. 0uCh! kk, so the rest of the day... same lah... laugh2 alot... make fun of teachers alot... played alot... after skool, do hw... ate at BK. wow! haha... am is totally infected with "Irfana's Laugh Disease"(ILD) haha... sorry fana. juz foolin ard. ahakz! yeeep laughin worse than meee... can u imagine? hehe. kay... tml's BIG EVENT: TUTORING EM3 STUDENTS IN FENGSHAN PRIMARY. argh!!! shit sia... but nvm... i'll juz try ta be nice. bring chocolates fer them ah... ehee!

WhAt iS GOiN ON MUUUN?

2004-07-07T23:32:00.000+08:00

hai! finally...starting to blog again. well,today,i aint got loadsa time on ma hands. well, explains my writing normally. and hey! im gon change the skin soon. my very own. wahaha! using dreamweaver. hopefully it turns out good. somehow, tis bloody shit thg doesnt allow flash stuff. darned. heck lah... aniwae, i went home from skool early today. i was reallie... man, it was like the worst headache ever. like headaches dat u fidget and cannot sit still sorta thg... ma maid had to come all the way down to bring me home. i guess partly cuz i slept late, tryna finish salmah's homework, wanting da bonus 10 marks fo handin up early. haha. kiasu rite? but at the end of da day, u'll realise it's all worth it! tho i had to skip malay, private lesson wit ms ng, band and alota other shit. *grins* at least i didnt have to go thru da history test! whee! well, still have ma fever *sighs* aniwae, been wantin to talk abt a fren of mine... well, she was one great, HUMBLE girl when i first met her. we were reallie reallie close. then thgs happened along da way wit all ma other frens. yup, alota stuff. but we got thru them aniwaes. unfortunately not in REAL talkin terms. even her best fren. i realised shez now wit da smart, popular grp i must say. and i tink she fits in there so far better than us. its hard for me to admit, but we were always the minah kinda ppl. popular in our own ways. tho not reallie THAT minah. juz u noe.... normal, average ppl. smart... yah, we have some. alota gossiping tho. but i find dat we mix together juz soo well wen we gossip. even among ourselves... haha. weirdos rite? but dats wat keep us goin. for 'her', she'll get soo uptight and held back and worries too much abt wat ppl tink abt her. i noe... its sad to say but shez one high maintenance gurl. alwaes want her reputation to be waaay up there... and her image, she doesnt wanna spoil it and thus, cause alota misunderstandings. like today, i saw a bulletin she posted abt an issue she tot was wise to let know the public. hm... i tot she was much smarter than dat. i mean, im not perasaan or wateva lah juz dat its true u noe... we HAVE been sayin stuff abt her. we cant help it if we tink that abt her riiite. of course w/o her knowledge or else... u noe, e consequences... okay, so the issue she brought up was abt her so-called screwed up life. it was entitled, "To all the ppl who annoy the f*** outta me". and in the bulletin, she categorised the ppl in 3 categories-her grandparents,makcik2,arseholes. for her grandparents, she said, "Screw you!"...blablabla... and wrote dat they contradict her from havin an enjoyable life. and the other two categories, she wrote, "Hypocritical b****. Got nothin betta to do izzit?... Gossip, Gossip, Gossip" *wonders in her stupidity* a) why wud she want ppl to know abt ppl's disliking for her? b) isnt dat like a negative way of seekin the public's attention?... okay, i understand... shez the type of person who wans fame... who likes the limelight. dats y shez alwaes seen on stage and stuff. she likes to attract attention. and dats okay wit me! i mean, im somesort of dat person myself... juz dat... not like dat. c) shez no different than the ppl she was referrin to when she brings down the names of certain ppl. haiii... im lost for words. so bloody loserly. like i give shyt... she controls her life. so i aint gon interfere. heck lah... she wans to tell ppl dat shez been bitcheed abt... leave her be... im still bein neutral wit her. klah, gtg... tml's a brand new day! whee!

NANA, hOWZ SkOOl?!

2004-06-30T19:39:00.000+08:00

YO PEEPZ! WEll iM bACk iN SkOOl NOW ANd it SUCKS tOtAllY! NO dOUbt lAh dAt i COUld MEEt UP Wit MA fRENS... bUt thE fRiGGiN WORk ANd ShYt tURNS ME Off SiA! hEAR HAM SCREAMiN hER fARkiN hEAd Off EVERY MORNiN... PENGUiN'S YAkkiNG dURiNG ASSEMblY... fARk SiA! thEN thEY CAME UP Wit RidiCUlOUS RUlES ANd bANNEd US fROM USiN E SPiRAl StAiRCASE WhiCh iS PROllY E ONlY thG dAt PREVENtEd ME fROM bEiN lAtE fOR ClASS EVERYdAY! hEll Wit dA SkOOl MUUUN!!! ANiWAE, liNA GAVE ME A GifT fROM OVERSEAS. it WAS SOME CANdlE SEt thG... AWWW... hOW SWEEt! i NEVER EXPECtEd hER tO GEt ANitiN fOR ME. WEll, COUldNt GEt MA fRENS StUff CUZ i WAS tOO BZ. diN EVEN GEt tO ShOP PROPERlY *SiGhS* MAYb NEXt tiME lAh! OkAY... SO, WAt MORE iS NEW iN SkOOl... hM... WEll, MA fREN hAd StEAd Wit tiS GUY fROM MA SkOOl. thEY WERE FRENS b4 lAh ANd WE tEASEd hER Abt hiM. ShE SAid ShE didNt lk hiM ANd StUff. SOON, WE CAME tO kNOW thEY WERE tOGEthER... OMG. it SOO UNbEliEVAblE! ShEZ tiS REAllY COOl GURl WE kNEW b4 N thEN... SUddENlY, tiS REAlliE UGlY ARSEhOlE CAME iNtO dA PiCtURE ANd RUiNEd OUR PERSPECtiVE Of hER. lYk SOME1 SAid, SEEMS dESPERAtE. i MEAN, NOt tO b A bitCh lAh... jUZ dAt... WAt dOES ShE SEES iN hiM?! hEZ EXtREMElY StUMPtEd. hM... hAhA. WOW! i didNt kNOW i COUld bE SO MEAN. ShEESh! WEll, ANitiN dAt MAkES hER hAPPY lAh... *lAUGhS* NOt MA bUSiNESS ANiWAE. WhEE!!! hEhE! klAh, GOt lOAdS Of MAlAY PROjECtS tO fiNiSh UP! NANti SAlMAh khUtUk CAM NAk MAMPOS SiAl! k... bYE!

SiGhS

2004-06-24T02:51:00.000+08:00

i AM SOO tiREEEd!!! hAii... GONNA GEt REAdY fOR MAlAYSiA iN 2hRS... WhiCh iS 5AM. CRAP! ANd iM NOt EVEN ASlEEP. WEll, WAS A lOOONG dAY. fiNAllY WOkE UP EARlY tOdAY... OR... ERR... YEStERdAY. i WAN tO kEEP mA PROMiSE Of fiNiShiNG UP mA hOMEWORk. WhEEE! i didN't... hAhA... WEll, hAlf ONlY lAh... i liEd tO thEM. hECk lAh! i dUN GiVE A dAMN! hM... lEtS SEE... mA bAG iS PACkEd. All thE CAMERAS ANd ShYt... OkAY! iM SEt!!! hM... tOO bAd it'S NOt A hOlidAY... GONNA hAftA lAYAN All thE PEEPZ iN M'SiA ANd StUff... GRR... WEll, GUESS ANYthiN fOR mA dEARESt CUZZiE WhO dOESN't EVEN hAVE thE SUPPORt fROM All hER SibliNGS jUSt CUZ thE dAMN GUY iS 15 YRS OldER! if i WERE thEM, i WOUldN't EVEN GiVE A ShYt SiA if hE WAS SOME 80-YR-Old APEk OR A bANGlA... blOOdY hEll! ANd NOt ONlY thEY'RE NOt GONNA AttENd thE WEddiNG, thEY'RE GONNA kiCk hER OUttA thE hOUSE thE MOMENt ShE GEtS MARRiEd... ASk hER tO StAY SOMEWhERE ElSE... OMG... WhAt thE fUCk iS thEiR PROblEM?!!! PASSAllAh ORANG NAk KAhWiN SAPER! jOdOh diER dAh PAt SitU! *SiGhS* ANiWAE, WE bORROWEd A WhOlE PilE Of VCDS fROM thE "VidEO EZ"-idENtitY, lE diVORCE, UPtOWN GiRlS, blUE CAR, PEtER PAN ANd jU ON 2 (jUSt WAtChEd, SCAREd thE ShYt OUttA ME!). WhEE! GONNA hAf lOAdSA fUN iN M'SiA! thE bUbblE GUM, thE ONE-NiGht iN hOtEL, thE ENdlESS SUPPlY Of fOOd, thE MASSiVE ShOPPiNG SPREE... WAAA! iM SOO GONNA bE SPOilt MAN! thE ShOES... thE ClOthES!... thE tRUNkER CAPS thAt i'VE bEEN lONGiNG fOR!!! i CAN't WAit! hEhE! ANiWAE, AM jUSt GOt bACk tOdAY. tOO bAd i COUldN't hAVE A lOOONG CONVERSAtiON Wit hER. hAhA! bUt iM SURE thE MANY tEStiMONiAlS PROVidEd fOR hER iN fRiENdStER CAN MAkE hER SMilE WhEN iM GONE. hEhE! RiGht AM? AhAkZ! AREN't i thE SWEEtESt? WEll, URE thE ONlY PERSON hU NOES bOUt tiS... i tiNK. SOO... PlEASE... WON't U tAG MAh hAVE-AlWAYS-bEEN-dEAd-bOARd?! kHEkHEkHE!!! AM... ANitiN jUZ MSG ME AitE? EMERGENCY LAHZ! bUt if U WAN Sth fROM M'SiA U tAk tERCAPAi, MSG ME tODAY! kAY?! dAtS WEN i'M thE NEARESt tO S'PORE! hAhA... lk dAtS GONNA hElP! hEY SWEEtiE!!! fiNd WAYS tO PUbliSCiSE mA blOG fOR ME CAN?! likE ON MSN OR WhAtEVER.... thANkS AM! YOU dA bOMb!!!! WAkAkAkA... i'll MiSS U... dUN MiSS ME kAY? (hAhA... didN't hAftA tEll U. GUARANtEE WON't! *lAUGhS*) bYE! PRAY fOR ME AitE? "Bismillahirahmannirahim. Ya'Allah Tuhanku. Berilah perjalanan ku ke M'sia perjalanan yang selamat dan juga keselamatan kepada kawan-kawanku. Amin." hAhA... itU jE... U AlSO MUZ PRAY fOR ME AhZ! hEhE! bEfORE i diSAPPEAR, i jUZ WANNA SAY hOW MUCh i lOVE YOUZ GUYZ! U dA bEST!!! StAY hOME dO hOMEWORk kAY?! klAh, SEE U WEN SChOOl REOPENS! tOOdlEZ!

dEAd MEAt

2004-06-23T00:00:00.000+08:00

GRR... CAN i EVA WAkE UP EARlY?! Shit lAh! PlANNEd tO dO hOMEWORk! PARENtS ARE All NAGGY bOUt it... thEY MAdE ME PROMiSE i'll fiNiSh it bY tMl. thEN GONNA b hEAdiN tO MAlAYSiA thE dAY AftER tMl. hENtAM jE lAh! ANiWAE hAd NOthiNG tO EAT jUSt NOW SO... PARENtS bROUGht ME OUt tO EAt At ARNOldS... YUMMM... bUt MAdE ME fEEl SO blOAtEd UP... CRAP! mA EXERCiSE tOdAY...All dOWN thE dRAiN. kAY... WONt b GEttiN ONliNE tMl. bUSY dAY... WEll, i GUESS dAtS thE ENd Of it. WONt b tOUChiN thE lAPtOP till NEXt WEEk! tOOdlEZ!

WAddA fUCk?

2004-06-21T21:10:00.000+08:00

mAN, fiNAllY Sth ON tiS blOOdY thG SiA... NOW iM SO CONfidENt Wit dA htMl ShYt. ANiWAE, i GUEsS iM GONNA StARt AdVERtiSiNG MA blOG hERE. WEE!!! thO, dES hARdlY ANYthiN ON it. hEhE... WEll, i WOkE UP lAtE tOdAY... AROUNd 3.30 liddAt. WUZ ACtUAlly PlANNiN tO dO MA hOMEWORk. i ENdEd UP REAdiN GURl MAGS iNStEAd. CRAP SiA. WEll i GUESS i'll jUSt hAftA SUffER tMl. hAiii... ANiWAE, i kNOW tiS SOUNdS kiNdA StUPid ANd All bUT fAiE ACtUAllY SAid hiE tO mE ON MSN. iM MEltiN... USUAllY hE dOESN't EVEN bOthER tO tAlk tO mE WhEN i APPROACh EM... YEAh, hE SAid hE WUZ bOREd SO hE dECidEd tO tAlk tO mE... bUT SO WAt? hE did it ANiWAE... hEhe... WOW, iM jUSt SOO AddiCtEd tO hiM. i MEAN All thE EMOtiONAl bAGGAGE hAS bEEN thRASHEd OUt bUt RitE NOW, EVERYtiME i thiNk Of hiM, i GEt SOO EXCitEd ANd hAPPY. SERiOUSlY! hE MAkES ME hAPPY... i lOVE hIM tO bitS. i jUSt dUNNO hOW i GOt tHRU tHOSE dAYS AftER i lOST hiM. i dUN dESERVE hiM bUt i jUSt CAN't hElP it. i NOE... hE'S A GREAt GUY ANd hE dESERVES A RAViShiNG, SMARt GURl. i GOttA b hONESt hERE... I didN't fANCY hiM WEN WE fiRSt MEt. bUt thGS hAPPENEd AlONG thE WAY. i fEEl AS if dES A CONNECtION... YEAh, ChEESY bUt it'S tRUE. tHEN, WhEN WE bROkE Off, dUE tO PARENtS' ANd tEAChERS' diSAPPROVAl (likE "WhAtEVA" RitE?!!!) , i VOWEd NEVA tO bE iN ANYMORE ROMANtiC RElAtiONShiPS (PARENtS bRAiNWASh) ANd AlSO CUt Off bOYS fROM MA SChOOl lifE. bUt AS MUCh AS i WANt tO, i AlWAYS, AlWAYS thiNK Of hiM. WhEN i GAVE iT SOME thOUGht, EVERYtiME iM bUSY Wit WORk ANd StUff, thERE'S Still A PARt Of ME Wit hiM... likE... NO MAttER hOW CAUGht UP iN MA lifE i CAN b, hE'll Still b At thE bACk Of MA hEAd. it'S kiNdA SAd thAt tiS YR hE'll b GRAdUAtiN... i WONdER if hE'll Still kEEP iN tOUCh, AlREAdY NOW thAt hE hARdlY tAlkS tO ME. *SiGhS* bUt i GUESS WE'll jUSt hAftA SEE. i'll MiSS hiM EVEN MORE. WEll, i dUNNO WAt MA fRENS thiNK. i dUN REAlliE tALk AbOUt GUYS ANd ROMANCE iSSUES Wit thEM. i'LL SOUNd SOO StUPid! i'll b SUCh AN idiOt. *lAUGhS* WEll, fRiENdS ShUdN't CARE ANiWAE RitE? At lEASt NOt At tiS AGE. thEY'VE AlREAdY GOt thEiR hANdS fUll Wit thEiR OWN liVES. WhAt MORE if U lOAd thEM Wit SOME MUShY CRAP? *lOL* fURtHERMORE, i fiNd tHOSE tOtAllY lOVESiCK SChOOl GiRlS SUChA NUiSANCE. WEll, SAd tO SAY i WAS ONE Of thEM lASt YR... *lAUGhS* HM... MAYb it'S jUSt thE diSEASE thAt i hAtE. YAh, iM NOt tOtAllY MEAN U NOE... i CAN UNdERStANd WhY thEY ARE thE WAY thEY ARE. jUSt hAftA GiVE it SOME tiME b4 thEY SNAP bACk tO REAlitY. WEE! OkOk, ENUff Of tiS ShYt. i GOt A NEW HP!!! kAY... MAYb NOt NEW *SiGhS* MA dAD GOt A NEW HP, HiS RECENtlY-bbOUGht PhONE tO mA SiS ANd hERS tO MiNE. *SiGhS* SERiOUSlY NEEd tO StOP All tiS hANd-ME-dOWNS... bUt hEY! lOOK At it tiS WAY... GONE ARE thE dAYS WhEN mA PhONE diES OUt bY itSElf... WhEN i GEt EMbARRASSEd tO bRiNG OUt mA OUtdAtEd hP iN PUbliC... ANd ON n ON... WEE! i dUNNO WAt MOdEl thO... PAthEtiC MAN. 7610 i tiNK... dUNNO lA SiA.... hU CARES, NOt likE iMA fREAk fOR it. dUN REAllY MSG PPl... ANiWAE, iM SO GlAd SkOOl'S REOPENiN... i MiSS All MA GURlS... dARNEd... WEll, thAt ANd hiM... hEhE... Oh ANd bY thE WAY, tiS fANCY WORdS... i StOlE iT fROM hiM. MUAhAhAhA! fAiE, if U EVA CUM ACROSS tiS POSt, iM SOOORRRiEEE! ANd YUP, i MEANt EVERY WORd i SAid iN it... dAMN, i WiSh U WERE hERE... *SiGhS* OkOk... iM jUSt GONNA EAt mA bEN N jERRY'S ChOC fUDGE bROWNiE RitE NOW... hAiii... tAStin hEAVEN... hEhE... klAh, bYE!

blOOdY hELl...

2004-06-20T05:40:00.000+08:00

dAMMit... itS bEEN mONthS iVE CREAtEd tiS CrAP bUt i jUSt dUN SEEm tO GEt tiS RitE... tAKES mE yEArS EvEn tO ChANGE thE blOOdY SkiN! WEll, WAt thE hEll... tiS CrAP WiLl StiLl b UNdER CONStRUCtiON. i dOUbt AnYOnES EvEn rEAdiNG tiS UNtil lAtER. AnYhOO... tO ALl MA miCROChiP fRENS... jUSt bEAR Wit mE hERE kAY?!!! *SiGhS*